Beckham jersey ruins friendship

david beckham

David Beckham, moderately famous for playing soccer and extraordinarily famous for inexplicable reasons, has become the subject of a gurfuffle as he tossed a game-worn jersey to two ten year old former best friends. Former, because the ownership of that LA Galaxy sweat rag has torn the two apart.

“Okay” you’re saying to yourself, “has Stractical stopped commenting on public relations issues completely to focus on linking to hilarious news?” Well, let me tell you emphatically — sort of.

But read the last line of the article (that’s usually where the best/worst media relations happens)

Alexi Lalas, the Galaxy’s GM, had a solution.

“Cut the thing in half and give half to each,” he said.

Snide remarks are tremendously fun and effective in some situations but not here. David Beckham was brought over to Major League Soccer and given a $5 million per year contract (the average MLS player makes about $90 thousand) because he is a publicity machine. Most North Americans didn’t even know there was a professional soccer league until Becks crossed the Atlantic. With that in mind, its best to keep the goodwill flowing as the interest in the sport is so tied to one dude.

How much does a jersey cost? $60? How long would it take Beckham to bicycle kick a soccer ball in said jersey? Three minutes? How long would it take him to autograph the aforementioned jersey? 18 seconds? Are we figuring this out, LA Galaxy? Hey, maybe the crazies parents will still battle this one out in court, but at least you’ll have done everything you can.

One jersey for each boy with autographs and smiles. You don’t want to be the unforgiving parent here, teaching these lads about right and wrong and sharing and giving. You want to be the fun uncle who brings presents and good times and then leaves and everyone loves you. Be the fun uncle, Alexis Lalas.

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